Got Fear?? Get Over It!!

So, I had this "fear" ... Not that it's completely gone.. and we don't even need to put a name on it just now... But I made a huge step towards squashing it today. There are so many parts to my job that I love to do and I would do them all day long if I could... especially when it involves being face to face with people.. and/or watching someone's reaction when we find that perfect house; Or helping first-time buyers get into the home that they plan to start their family in... Or helping a seller transition from the home they've watched their children grow up in to something more fitting for a "new lifestyle" ... And yes, even the occasional dinner awarded after taking the time to personally help a client move in or out of a home! Been there and done all of the above and more... and have loved most every minute of it!

Then there's the other stuff. The prospecting, the cold calling and even the warm calling. Not my favorite.. not by a long shot! What's the big deal? For alot of people maybe it's not... For me... ugh. The thought of picking up the phone to call some unsuspecting soul in order to see if I might be of some service to them sends shivers up and down my spine... For the love of god... why should I call them if they haven't expressed a need??

As my business coach says... "That is your "drunk monkey" talkin' on your shoulder!" I know what you're thinking... Just like me when I first heard that... What the heck is a drunk monkey?? lol.  Well, after I got used to the term, I came to realize that we all have one. Whether it's been at a job, or perhaps a social or family situation... we have all experienced a "drunk monkey" talking to us! This is the little guy (voice) that talks to us and tries to convince us why we shouldn't attempt to do some of the things we know we have to do in order to succeed! Know what I'm talking about now? Well, for me, when it comes to picking up that phone, it's not the heaviness of the phone that stops me... It's that darn drunk monkey! And my drunk monkey has a very very large "fear of rejection." Fear that someone might feel my message is not worth hearing... or that I am "bothering" the person on the other end of the line... etc.

So... today, I ignored the monkey. I picked up the phone and made calls... and calls... and calls. And yes, it's possible that not everyone was thrilled to death to hear from me... but.. there is another side! During my dialing "binge" I discovered something.. Or maybe because it had been such a long time, I was just "reminded" of something....There were people who actually were happy I called... Some because they simply love to keep "updated" on what's happening in Real Estate and others just because they hadn't heard from me in so long they were just happy to say hello! Hmmm. Imagine that!! Granted... today did not result in an immediate listing or an immediate sale... but I did make some new connections as well as some re-connections that will be of immeasureable value for reasons both personally and professionally.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is... "Got fear?" You need to get over it. How? Well, another thing that my coach said really hit home.. You will force yourself to get over the "fear" when the "pain" of staying stuck in the same spot out-weighs that which you are afraid of! Wow right?!?! The only weight I needed to get off my shoulder was that of my darn drunk monkey! lol. I'm not gonna pretend that he won't quietly creep up there again, but I have a feeling that next time, he will be much much easier to push off!
So... what's your drunk monkey saying to you?? I would love to hear from you! In the meantime... here's a few quotes that others have uttered that may help...

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.
Frank Herbert

If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.
Marcus Aurelius

And last but not least... for my "warrior women" out there...

You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do.
Eleanor Roosevelt